Since Jane is hitting it off with Bingley, the Bennets are invited to chill with Bingley, his sisters and Darcy at Netherfield. And because the Bennets were oh so very kind to trek all the way out to say hi at Netherfield, the Bingleys had to return the favor and visit Longbourne (because if you didn't, OH! what would the neighbors think?).
So everyone's visiting and chatting and laughing politely and Elizabeth is examining. Elizabeth does not like the Bingley sisters. Even though they seem to like Jane, they still treat the Bennets like they're not worthy to be crossing their Oh-We-Just-Ordered-That-Granite-From-Florence floor. She suspected that much of the reason they were being so nice to Jane was because of Mr. Bingley, who couldn't hide his puppy-dog-lovey eyes if he wore sunglasses and space suit. And Jane is definitely in love with Bingley. But for once, Lizzie is relieved that her sister's mild demeanor will keep everyone from knowing, and keep everyone from thinking that Jane was pursuing Mr. Bingley. (Men Pursue Women in the Regency Era. Period...Unless you're Caroline Bingley and you can afford it. More on that later.) Lizzie tells her BFF Charlotte this. And Charlotte's like, Okay, but if Jane doesn't show ANY signs of affection (ie, winking furiously, slowly licking lips, laughing hilARiously at everything...cause that's how you let them know, right?), then how is Bingley going to know she likes him? And Lizzie's like, Well, I can see that she likes him, so Bingley would have to be a brick wall not to see it too. Right, but you know Jane way better than he knows her. She should put a ring on it, and fall in love with him later. That's great if you want to make sure you marry a rich dude, but what if she wants to be HAPPY?? She barely knows him... ...All the better! She hasn't seen any of his faults yet. Happiness in marriage is left to chance. She's just as likely to be happy with him if she married him tomorrow versus a year from now. That's absurd and you know it! You'd never do that yourself. Charlotte doesn't reply. So our camera swings round to Netherfield where, unbeknownst to Elizabeth, a brooding soul was grappling with the "uncommon intelligence in the beautiful expression of her dark eyes..." It's lines like these that explain the millions of crazed Darcy lovers around the world. You can see it, can't you? Huddled in an over-sized chair by a roaring fireplace, Mr. Darcy sits, rubbing his fingers across his furrowed brow, madly, desperately, excruciatingly in love with a woman he shouldn't be... I digress. So like you do, when you're completely socially inept and stupidly in love, Darcy starts hovering near Elizabeth at group gatherings. Does he start a conversation? Laugh at her jokes? Offer a counter-point? No, he figures that as long as his body is within a foot or two of hers, he's making progress. Elizabeth notices, and is sure that he is listening for a reason to make fun of her. During one such incident, Charlotte is with her, and is a totally supportive and awesome best friend (not). She tells Darcy, You should hear Elizabeth play (piano) sometime. She's great. For the record, Elizabeth and pianos have never been good friends, and never will. In fact, continues the scheming Charlotte, Lizzie, why don't you play something right now? So Lizzie plays. Probably something like "The Itsy Bitsy Spider." Mary takes this as an opportunity to push Lizzie aside and show off some real skill. Or at least, what she thinks is real skill. Once Elizabeth is away from the piano, Sir William Lucas decides the evening is not awkward enough and basically tells Darcy, Hey, look at this super hot babe! You should totally dance with her. And Lizzie is like, oh no, *cough* *cough*, I can't dance, I'm sick... And Darcy is like, I'd be down to dance. And Lizzie's head is like, Oh, NOW you wanna dance???!! What she says is: Mr. Darcy is all politeness. And she high-tails it out of there. In slinks Miss Caroline Bingley. I know what you're thinking, she says to Darcy. Shaking away the image of Elizabeth in a silky red dress, he says: Uh, probably not. Caroline says, You're thinking how horrible it would be to spend every evening like this. Darcy's like, Nope. I was thinking about Miss Elizabeth Bennet. Caroline's mouth drops to the floor. But she picks it up quickly and says: Well, then when should I wish you congratulations? Darcy's like, Can't I just like a girl? And Caroline snaps, No of course, but if you're serious, then it's settled. Enjoy your mother-in-law. I bet you're just gonna love those cozy Sunday brunches with the gang. Sufficiently satisfied that she had destroyed his hopes, Caroline slink slink slinked away. To be continued next week!
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(Sorry about the tea stain, but it was from my Jane Austen mug so it seemed alright to keep this paper and not start a new one. :)) Alright so now we meet the Lucas family. Sir William Lucas is the head of the household. He was in trade, then he became mayor of Meryton, and then he was knighted. So now he's fairly wealthy and doesn't have to work. His wife, Lady Lucas, is nice, and more importantly has a lots of kids. Now forget all that because you won't need that information for the rest of the book. All you need to know is the Lucases eldest daughter is 27, her name is Charlotte, and she's BFFs with Elizabeth. (Historical Interlude: The reason Charlotte's age is important is that she is unmarried. Being a woman, 27 and unmarried during this time was...problematic, to say the least. We'll come back to this later.) REPORTER'S VOICE: The Semi-Finals of Community Dances is over, and only the Most Embarrassing Mothers are left. As they straighten their bonnets and tighten their corsets, its clear only one thing is on their minds: Mr. Bingley. As the Singles Superbowl draws near (the Netherfield Ball), we wonder: How far are these Husband-Hunters prepared to go? We'll find out next time, but first, the post-game report from Mertyon: MRS. BENNET: Charlotte looked pretty good out there, wouldn't you say? MISS LUCAS: Absolutely. She was in top form and it didn't surprise me in the least that she was the first to be asked to dance by Mr. Bingley. MRS. BENNET: Sure, but what happened in the second quarter? MISS LUCAS: Yeah... MRS. BENNET: She just seemed to lose it. Fumbling all over the place, losing the ball to Jane... MISS LUCAS: Yeah, and let's talk about Jane for a minute. Who IS this Jane Bennet? I mean, nobody had heard of her before today, and then suddenly, WHAM-- MRS. BENNET: It's raw talent, is what it is right there. She's definitely captured the eye of Mr. Bingley, but whether she can sustain it is another question. MISS LUCAS: Absolutely. Let's turn our attention for a second to Elizabeth, how did she do today? MRS. BENNET: She came out of the gate with a ferocity I haven't seen since the Assembly last year-- MISS LUCAS: Yeah, what WAS in that punch?? MRS. BENNET: --but that comment from Mr. Darcy... MISS LUCAS: Oooh, yeah, that's gonna hurt.. MRS. BENNET: The Derbyshire kids these days...they grow 'em like nothing I've ever seen... MISS LUCAS: Helluva looker... MRS. BENNET: ...but horrible attitudes. It's just gonna hurt you on the field. MISS LUCAS: Well he's lost Lizzie's heart, that's for certain. MRS. BENNET: And mine. MISS LUCAS: Well, that's our show folks! Tune in next time for the final showdown, the Singles Superbowl, and find out who will win Mr. Bingley's heart. To be continued next week! Comment below if there's a style or format that you'd like to see the next chapter paraphrased in. After the Meryton Assembly dance, Elizabeth (nickname Lizzie, if you'll remember) and her sister Jane scurry up to their shared bedroom and hunker down for some serious-time pillow talk. Jane isn't a big share-your-feelings kinda gal, but she spills the beans with Lizzie: I really like Mr. Bingley. Yeah? says Lizzie. Yeah. He's nice, he's polite, he has good manners....he's nice... ...he's hot... I couldn't believe he asked me to dance TWICE!! Really?! You couldn't believe that he would ask the prettiest girl in the room to dance with him? Lizzie... Well, you have my approval. You've liked stupider people. Lizzie! It's true! You like EVERYONE. Remember that guy who stole our spot in line after we had waited 3 hours to see Les Mis?? He was so cold, he needed to get inside... And the girl who claimed that your ladybug science fair project was actually hers? That was fifth grade, she didn't know any better... And the guy who punched you in the face to take your restaurant reservation?? He didn't mean it... And the WORST part, exclaims Elizabeth, is that you truly believe that all of those people genuinely meant the best in that moment, and that every person is good and wholesome and honest. Well yeah. While Elizabeth tears her hair out over her sister's unreasonably good nature, we'll swing over to the boys' sleepover at Netherfield Park. Can you believe how many gorgeous women were at that dance?? exclaims Bingley. Nope, retorts Darcy. I mean, GORGEOUS! That red head, the two blondes, even the brunette wasn't half-bad. Yup. But that Bennet girl, ohhhhhhhh man, Jane....Jane Jane Jane.... What was her name again? *cue soundtrack to "Maria" from West Side Story* JAAAAAAAAAAANE! I'VE JUST MET A GIRL NAMED JAAAAAAAAAAAANE, AND SUDDENLY I'VE FOUND, HOW WONDERFUL A SOUND-- Please stop. Come on man, are you going to sit there and tell me not a single one of the women in that room caught your eye? Not a single one lifted you up on love's light wings and made you see the world as if for the first time? Not a single one made you believe that love is tangible and real and possible and true? Didn't you think any of them were at least...pretty? Yours was. But she smiled too much. Thus commenced more hair tearing on Bingley's part, which only lasted a short while before he was lifted away by "love's light wings" again and soon forgot the sulking Mr. Darcy... And Darcy sat, and Darcy brooded, and Darcy couldn't quite shake the image of a particular pair of piercing brown eyes from his head...
To be continued next week! CHAPTER 3 Before we dive in any further, we are about to meet a bunch of new characters, so I drew you a little map to keep track :) Okay so, Mr. Bingley returns Mr. Bennet's visit (that was a thing in those days, if someone visited you at your house, you were expected to have dinner with them at theirs), and there's all this stuff about the Bennet girls watching from the window, but not actually meeting him, and they hear Mr. Bingley is bringing a bunch of girls to the dance but they turn out to be his sisters, blah, blah, blah, but basically we just want to get to the juicy part, which is the MERYTON ASSEMBLY (a community dance): Mr. Bingley arrives at the dance with two of his sisters, his sister's husband, and Mr. Darcy. Everyone likes Bingley. His sisters and the husband are alright. And Mr. Darcy is a douche. The reason for his doucheness comes primarily from an incident with Lizzie. Lizzie is chilling on the side of the room, taking a break from the dancing, when she overhears Darcy talking to Bingley. Bingley is like, Dude, come dance! These chicks are crazy hot! And Darcy is all, I certainly shall not. But...! But...! and Bingley *gestures wildly to all of the incredibly gorgeous women in the room.* You're dancing with the only pretty girl in the room, says Darcy, with a nod to Jane. (Lizzie does a silent whoop! whoop! for Jane) I know, says Bingley, but hey, what about her sister? She seems awesome! Don't look now, but she's sitting behind you. Darcy looks behind him. He catches Lizzie's eye. Turns back to Bingley. Meh, she's alright, but not hot enough to tempt me, says Darcy. Thus, Lizzie does not feel particularly warm and fuzzy toward Mr. Darcy. Word of Warning For Young Men Entering Small Towns: Don't say anything you wouldn't be comfortable seeing as a headline in the paper the next day. Within minutes, the entire room knows the story. And the name of 'Darcy' is immediately attached to 'PROUD.' To be continued next week!! Comment below if there's a particular scene you want to make sure gets paraphrased (some stuff I leave out because, well, I'm paraphrasing :) Chapter 2
Mr. Bennet had already visited Mr. Bingley. But toying with his wife was way too much fun to let her know right away. While Lizzie was trimming a hat one afternoon, Mr. Bennet casually said, I hope Mr. Bingley will like it. How would we know? said Mrs. Bennet, Since you won't visit him! Maybe Mrs. Long will introduce him? offered Lizzie. Pssshhh. She's just trying to get him for her two nieces. She is selfish, hypocritical and I have no opinion of her. A silence fell on the group. Kitty began to cough. STOP COUGHING KITTY!! Have some compassion for my nerves, said Mrs. Bennet. It's not like I enjoy coughing, said Kitty. When is the next ball? interrupted Mr. Bennet. Two weeks tomorrow, answered Lizzie. NOOOOO! said Mrs. Bennet, Then Mrs. Long can't introduce us because she will be out of town until the day before and she won't have time to meet him herself and so she can't introduce us and none of you will get married and we will have to live in the streets and beg for food and life will be OVER. Why don't you introduce Mr. Bingley to her? Mr. Bennet suggested. Mrs. Bennet turned very slowly toward her husband with clenched teeth. How could I do that, Mr. Bennet? she said quite slowly, When SOMEONE won't visit him, SOMEONE won't introduce us, and SOMEONE has made it utterly impossible me to MEET HIM MYSELF?!? I suppose you're right, said Mr. Bennet, Knowing someone for two weeks is hardly enough time to feel comfortable introducing them to someone else. What do you think, Mary? Mary looked a bit like a goldfish, mouth open and dumbstruck, in that moment. While Mary is adjusting her ideas, let's talk about Bingley, continued Mr. Bennet. I'm sick of Mr. Bingley. Really?! exclaimed Mr. Bennet, I wish you'd said that before I visited him. Well, oh well, we can't escape knowing him now... All hell broke loose in the Bennet household. Mrs. Bennet was all, Yeah, I totally knew you'd visited him, Mary pretended not to care, Kitty was like OMG, Jane and Lizzie wanted to know if he was going to the ball, and Lydia was like, So is he HOTTTTT??? Mr. Bennet said: Kitty, you may now cough as much as you like. To be continued next week! Click "Recommend" on the right to receive updates when a new post is put up. Take Jane Austen's classic tale, "Pride and Prejudice." Peel away the barrier of language. Cut off both ends of the unclear historical references. Take the pulp, stick it in a blender. Add 3 cups of humor, a teaspoon of internet slang, and a pinch of historical explanation. Blend until smooth and casual. Zap it with a bolt of Inspiration for a delicious, modern-day Austen the whole family will love! A new chapter each week! Click "recommend" on the right to receive Facebook updates when a new chapter is released! CHAPTER 1 Everyone knows that if you're a single dude with money, you want to put a ring on it. In fact, if you fall into the above category and you decide to move to Longbourne, England, you can pretty much assume that the mothers of the town have already picked out flower arrangements and bridesmaid dresses and only need to consult you on which of their unmarried daughters you'll be taking off their hands. Mrs. Bennet had 5 unmarried daughters. (Historical Interlude: At this time, property, status and income was passed on to the eldest son. Without a son, the inheritance went to the closest male relative, no matter how weird, awkward or vaguely creepy they might be (we'll get to that in a bit). Unmarried women and widows were left to the mercy of this male heir.) Which is why the arrival of the young, handsome, and wonderfully single Mr. Bingley was a BFD. So Mrs. Bennet said to Mr. Bennet, Hey, did you know this rich guy just moved into Netherfield Park (a big, beautiful estate nearby)? And Mr. Bennet was like, Nope. And Mrs. Bennet said, Well his name is Bingley, and he's rich, and he's SINGLE. Hint, hint, nudge, nudge. So? So!?!? He should marry one of our daughters! Is that why he moved here? Of course not, but he'll probably fall in love with one of them, so get off your butt and go visit him! I have to go pick out flower arrangements. Nah. (Historical Interlude: Proper acquaintances were made head of the household, who had to visit the new person first before the females could be introduced. Yeah, I don't really get it either. But there ya go.) Mr. Bennet! Think of your daughters! Why don't you go, and I'll send a letter saying he can marry whichever daughter he chooses. I'll throw in a good word for Lizzie. OH MY GOODNESS!! What am I going to do with you!! You have no compassion for my nerves. On the contrary. Your nerves have been my closest friends these last twenty years. AH! Don't worry, I'm sure there will be lots of other young men. What's the point of a whole herd of young men if you won't visit them!? I promise if there is a herd of stampeding men that come into town, I will visit all of them. To be continued... Click "Recommend" on the right to be updated when the next chapter is posted! In case you haven't seen our Facebook page, we launched sign-ups and announcements for our auditions about two weeks ago and have had a very enthusiastic response. Folks have been emailing me with how excited they are about this project, just based the information available to them online. We've already received audition submissions from actors between 19 and 60 across the Portland Metro area. And auditions aren't even until January! SPACE We've received our first drafts of contracts from both our performance space and our rehearsal space, and all that is left is to iron out a few details and sign on the dotted line! THANK YOU to ShoutHouse Theatre for hosting our rehearsals & auditions! THANK YOU to Portland Actors Conservatory for hosting our performances! And a very special THANK YOU to an incredible, last-minute donation which is allowing us to EXTEND OUR PERFORMANCE RUN!! Instead of performing one weekend, we are now performing TWO! Check out our dates on our Shows page. FUN WITH THE IRS! We are in the midst of officially applying for non-profit status! Our Articles of Incorporation are submitted, Bylaws in-process, and very soon I will be jumping into the grand wonderfulness which is the 26-page 1023 Tax-Exemption form, required of 501 c-3 non-profits.
Yay taxes! What this means though, is that every donation we receive once we are a non-profit is 100% tax-deductible for you!! This will become especially relevant in a little while...stay tuned, we have more awesome things coming for you. :) Last night I invited 11 lovely actors and artists to squeeze into my SE apartment and read "Pride & Prejudice, an adaptation." Huddled around two coffee tables and a cork board propped up on a chair, we fueled ourselves with wine and cheese and laughed our way through the play. I got some absolutely wonderful feedback in our post-reading discussion--it was fabulously exciting to see so many people get into a passionate conversation around this piece! At the end, I asked how many of them would want to work on this piece, given the opportunity. Every single hand went up. A HUGE Thank You to the lovely people who took time out of their busy lives to support this story: Sarah Yeakel, Madeline Shier, Nate Cohn, Kensie Sempert, Alan Cline, Rose Proctor, Anthony Arnista, Elizabeth Parker, Angela Van Epps, Vanessa Peacock, and Cooper!! Meanwhile, we have four interviews lined up with potential sound design candidates. Our proposal to do this show with a highly reputable theater in town is in. Two potential costume designers and a growing love for this piece. More steps forward... Hi everyone! I wanted to notify you as soon as the decision was made: we are altering the date of the performance of "Pride & Prejudice, an adaptation." Originally, we wanted the show to go up in Fall 2015. While there is a slight possibility that this could still happen, we've decided for a number a reasons that it will be better in the long-run for us to put the show up in Summer 2016. Our reasons are: 1. Many of the spaces we are talking to about renting have already booked their Fall season, so availability is tricky. If we book a space now for the Summer, there are many more options available to us. 2. Fall is cold and rainy and dark in Portland. Summer is more likely to encourage people to come out and see a show with a never-before-heard-of company. 3. Pushing the show back to Summer gives us ample time to build the reputation of Enso and of the show. We will not be twiddling our thumbs while Summer rolls around. Oh no. On the contrary: We will use the Fall to contact schools in the area and we will be doing preliminary Jane Austen workshops with students before the show happens. This will A. Build excitement in the community about the project B. Allow us to build the first connections for Enso's future Education program C. Meet and work with students who may join Enso later. I apologize if this news ruined any plans to see the show in the Fall. Do let me know if there are any concerns or questions about this change, I am all ears! Also, regarding those of you who pledged to our Kickstarter Campaign: My goal is that by December 2015 everyone will have received their reward as long as the reward doesn't require the actual show (so the posters, videos, etc won't be ready in December, for obvious reasons). At the moment, my life is filled with: a. An internship with Third Rail Repertory Theatre b. Nannying three days a week c. Contacting teachers to set up Jane Austen workshops in schools d. Teaching an acting class in Beaverton e. Starting a(nother) small business... Needless to say, it is FULL. But each of these things are part of the development of Enso, and are good, rewarding, wonderful things. The internship is allowing me to make connections in the Portland theatre scene. Nannying keeps my creativity alive and connects me to the parent-world (for future Enso Education purposes). Teaching builds connections in the education world. And this additional small business could eventually allow me to support myself enough that I can focus the majority of my time and energy on Enso. Thank you for your patience. :) Oh! and in case you didn't see our facebook page... I can't give specifics...yet... ...but... ...we potentially have a space.. . ...it is a professional theatre space... ...it has professional lighting/sound/etc... ...it has comfy chairs... ...it is run by magnificent people... That's all I can say for now! But we are quite, quite close to securing a real, live, actual, professional space....FOR REALSIES. Having this space means the show will happen in late July. BUT BELIEVE ME, THE SPACE IS WORTH THE WAIT. :) All my love. And keep on spreading it. Caitlin Hello everyone! Thank you so much for your patience the last two months, while Jordan and I relocated, reestablished ourselves and settled on solid ground. It's been a whirlwind, to say the least. Over the last six weeks I have: ~Moved all my belongings into storage ~Interviewed for a new job ~Auditioned for an internship with Third Rail Repertory Theater (and got it!) ~Said goodbye to Southern Oregon! ~Gone to Texas for a week (to visit Jordan's extended family) ~Started a new job the day we got back from Texas ~Hunted for an apartment in a seller's market (Portland is at 98% capacity!) ~FOUND ONE! ~Moved our stuff out of storage ~Moved in! And in the midst of all this I have used every spare moment to make Enso connections, find space for our show, and begin putting the pieces together for an education program. So here is how that's been going: AWESOME. I sent out a big email to some Portland theater folks to see if anyone was willing to chat with me over coffee. I ended up meeting with 5 or 6 different people, all of whom were eager to help and provided me with lots of useful information about the theater community. I've contacted just about every high school and college in the Portland/Beaverton area, offering our free Jane Austen workshops and asking if we might be able to rent space. I've also contacted a number of theaters--in fact, I am currently in conversation with the Artists' Repertory Theatre (considered by some to be the second-largest theater in Portland) to rent their space. Dennis Foster, co-founder of the Oregon Conservatory of Performing Arts (where I taught acting in Southern Oregon) has given me an acting instructor position with his group, and has been absolutely stellar in his support for Enso and our project. He is connecting me with many valuable people in the area and helping to boost my reputation so that we can slowly build support for an Enso Theatre Education program. Our new apartment is half-furnished and filled with unpacked boxes, but it is TOTALLY WORTH IT, to be able to spend time creating this beautiful thing. In fact, I'm currently writing you whilst sitting on my floor with our computer in front of me, also on the floor. :) I also wanted to share with you where some of the money is going. Because of your spectacular support, I was actually able to pay four of the behind-the-scenes people who were absolutely critical to the success of this Kickstarter: Arden Kilzer created our poster for the staged reading, Autumn Harrison edited two of our promotional videos, Garrett Lushingtonmanaged our website, and Logan Anderson, as you know, is our phenomenal musician. THANK YOU SO MUCH YOU GUYS for helping me make this happen!
Quick Tangent: Logan Anderson has actually launched his own Kickstarter, to assist the making of his second album "The Company" (some of you will be receiving it as part of your reward for donating to this campaign!). I've heard a few of the songs on this album and it is awesome. Plus, it's always fun to guess what kind of instrument Logan is using, because he's used everything from tea cups to plastic bags. Check out his Kickstarter here, listen to the songs in his video and see if you can guess the instruments he uses: http://kck.st/1GK5Kkb Part of the money will also help us to pay a marketing student to manage all our social media pages, and to connect us with places to hang flyers, etc, as we prepare for the show. So if anyone knows a Portland college student studying marketing, looking for a little extra cash, but mostly for resume experience, please let us know! And last but not least, I've begun yet another editing process with the script...seeing the staged reading come together was incredibly helpful in allowing me to see what works and what doesn't. I'm very excited about some of the new changes being made. :) Thank you so much everyone for your love and support! Keep a watchful eye, because as soon as we solidify a space, we will be in full-tilt advertise and spread-the-love mode. All the best, Caitlin |